The Secret Life of Bees

Although this was the second read for me, I did enjoy The Secret Life of Bees just as much as the first time I read it. It is chock full of life lessons, which I didn't really understand the first time around. It is a story of resiliency and self-love, crafted in such a way that the characters are the focus. The endearing interactions between the characters in the story make it a worthwhile and entertaining read.

Lily is the heroine of the story, a tortured soul burdened with past mistakes and pain. Through her journey from pre-teen child to maturity she learns many difficult lessons. Probably the most significant one is that self-love and forgiveness go hand-in-hand, and you cannot have one without the other. She spends a much of the time throughout the story dealing with her guilt and rejection issues. However, the resolution she finds with sisters and Rosaleen help her to realize her full potential as a loveable person.

When someone rejects you, your sense of self can be absolutely shattered. Especially when that person is someone who is important to you. Often, though, we unknowingly put our self-worth in the hands of others. Unable to obtain appropriate validation for ourselves, we hope that their approval will make us happy. However, this occurrence can act in the opposite way, actually pushing the very people we hope to attract farther away. Lily and T. Ray both needed approval from each other, but T. Ray didn't know how to give it and Lily didn't know how to ask for it. Thus they were stuck at a crossroads, and Lily was forced to make the decision to leave.

In the pink house, she found solace in the sisterhood of women. She was able to live calmly and peacefully, learning the life lessons and gaining knowledge of her mother's life. When the time finally arrived for her to have her climactic discussion with August, she was mature enough to deal with it, grieve as necessary, have an emotional release, and be able to move on with her own life.

When people are unable to deal with their guilt, regret, and emotion, they become like T. Ray-angry, resentful, and just plain mean. He clearly had been a somewhat sensitive man when he married Deborah, but was so shattered by her rejection that it affected every aspect of his life. He became mean and uncaring simply because he had internal hurts that needed attention.

In a way, Lily's struggle represents the human experience. We all have regrets, guilt, anger, and actions we wish we could go back and change. In the real world, it takes a combination of much self-reflection and support in the way of friends or family to get through tough situations.

I am interested to see what the movie version of this book will bring. It certainly has the potential to be a great chick-flick, and I hope it doesn't disappoint.

The Lovely Bones (Final Post)

It struck me as I was finishing this book why, exactly, I had not gotten that much out of it the first time I read it. I realized that at that time, it had been less a character study and more a murder mystery to me. The first time around, I kept expecting some big, climactic scene with Mr. Harvey and the family and it just didn't happen. This time around, I saw the irony in his death. He had killed in such torturous and brutal ways, but his death by fallen icicle was quite mundane. We can assume, however, that Sebold's version of heaven would be directly in line with her version of hell, and it is implied that he will perhaps be haunted by the women he killed for all eternity.

While the family came back together at the end, it leaves the reader hoping for a complete and total reconciliation. Maybe enough time had passed for that to occur. But I did find that Abigail's return to her family added the necessary closure for the end of the book. I don't know if I believe that was a very realistic action for her character, but it makes for a much better story than if she had spent the rest of her life at the vineyard job.

For Susie to inhabit Ruth's body to be with Ray was a weird twist. I understood it that Ruth had done this for Susie, but I was confused as to why. Again, it made for some much needed closure on the part of the reader, but it seemed farther "out there" than the rest of the book. For Ray to realize he was with Ruth but not with her body seemed very strange, considering that he had only known Susie as a classmate in jr. high.

Overall, I feel like I got much more out of this book the second time around. It was media and newsworthy when I read it the first time and I failed to identify with the hype. However, this second read provided me with more insight and prepared me to want to see the movie version.

The Lovely Bones (First-Half Post)

Disturbing. That is the first word that comes to mind when thinking of this book. I read it when it first came out, and felt the same way. However, I was in quite a different point in my life then, and I am actually seeing it in a new light now.

I would really like to think that Heaven is like Susie describes; full of all the things you loved here on earth, with the possibility of running into those who have passed before you. I found it interesting how Alice Sebold was able to come up with a version of this place, where the dead are actually real live characters who interact with an emotional response to the actions of the living. I am only halfway through the book at this point, and can only vaguely recall what happens later on. But it is interesting how Susie seems have so much insight into the lives of those she loves. She looks upon them in an almost parental way, with protective instincts and emotional intelligence way beyond that of her earthly age in years.

Grief is a very personal journey, as anyone who has been through it can tell you. While it would be nice to believe that in real life families are able to cope as a group in a neat little grieving process, that is not the case. Often the pain one family member sees in another becomes like a mirror, and the reflection looking back is too much to bear. Instead of relying on each other, each person retreats into his or her own pain, thus eliminating the vision staring them in the face. Then, as a result, often they look outside (in this case, the marriage) for solace. The person outside the situation offers a sympathetic shoulder, often seeming like they truly understand. However, what the outsider is actually offering is an escape from the pain that lies inside the household. It is very easy to want to medicate that pain as fast and furiously as possible, and that is when the relationships in the family/marriage become strained. In the case of Abigail and Jack, Abigail looks outside her marriage to medicate her own pain. Her attraction to Len is clearly just a "macaroon" for her soul. The fact that she likes a quick fix to emotional upheaval is alluded to earlier in the book, when alcohol and chocolate are mentioned as past vices. Jack, however, has allowed his obsession with Mr. Harvey become his own form of self-medication. He is trying to fill a void by trying to find answers, even though he knows it will not bring his daughter back. He is seeking revenge, as any parent would, and he thinks if he can just get it, he will be relieved of some level of internal pain.

Jemima J by Jane Green

I have to say this is one of the best books I have read in a long time. I usually use the "How easily can I put it down" school of thought to gauge how well I like a book, and this one was in my hands for two days straight. It was the perfect poolside read, and it went so quickly that it seemed much shorter than its 373 pages.


I'm pretty sure Jemima and I would be fast friends. She was so easy to relate to. Her character was complex, and she had many of the same insecurities that each of us face every day. The dating dilemmas she faces are quite common. I found it particularly funny that The Rules was mentioned in the story. My single friends and I have an ongoing debate as to whether or not The Rules actually proves itself to be a valid dating strategy. BTW, we are reserving judgement at this time, more research is needed!



It also was pretty funny to see the internet as something so new. Online dating doesn't seem to have changed much, except people are much smarter about it and don't allow personal information to be so freely available. As was the case with Brad, it is true that many people can look fabulous on paper and be complete and total duds in real life.


I loved the character of Ben for being so understated; good looking without the usual man-slut tendencies. While he had his one-night stands here and there, throughout the book he came to realize they were largely unfulfilling and mostly cumbersome. This, of course, is what women hope for all men! He yearned for someone with real substance; it's only unfortunate that he didn't see those qualities in Jemima until she was thin and beautiful. However, we ladies know that it would be unrealistic for him to find her attractive until she was able to love herself, and she loved herself thin.


I found Jane Green's style to be really interesting. While some people found the switch from first person to third person to be confusing, I thought it added to the story. It made it seem more like a fairytale. I likened it to Burl Ives' Snowman character in the "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" movie. I could really picture how the book could easily be made into a movie, with those parts being voiced-over by Dame Judi Dench or someone similar.


This book did remind me of Bridget Jones' Diary, and I wondered (and haven't checked yet) which came out first. There were many similarities, except when I started reading Bridget Jones I was immediately turned off by the use of a certain swear word that would have led to a mouth full of soap during my childhood. In Jemima J, the content seemed less raw; more innocently raunchy, if there is indeed such a thing.


Apparently this book is very popular, but I hadn't ever heard of it until this class. (Where have I been?) As I carried it with me various places, others would notice and rave about it. Definitely Jane Green could be a new favorite author, as I plan to read some of her other books. Anyone read more of her books? Feel free to post "to read" suggestions and alert me if there are any I should avoid like the plague.